Running

I'm running in place going nowhere
Cuz
There is nowhere to go.
Down,
Down,
That's where I will end up.

Maybe if I run fast enough,
I will stop the time
And stay in this now
Forever.

Alone, but not alone.
So much harder.

The ghost of the past
Running along side of me.

Remembering is gone.
Now is gone.
The future is gone.
What is left?

I'm running in place going nowhere
Cuz
There is nowhere to go.

by Sazzy Oh

~* Life *~

What is life?
Is it a test?
Pass
Or
Fail?
Is it a place to learn and grow?

When I was young,
Long, long ago,
There was only
Me.

I guess most people know there is more
But
For me, no one explained that to me.

So I went merrily on my
Me- way
For a very long time.

People came and went:
Grandparents,
Parents,
Friends,
Even children.

They passed through that door into,
Well, who knows where?

Into Heaven?
Into Nothingness?
Into Space?
Or,
Did they merge back into the Allness?

Are we not all part of each other:
Plants,
Animals
People?

How can anyone not see that?
Even in my ... Me-ness
I knew that.

Now I'm older and I understand more,
Not everything,
But more.
I know I'm growing
Each and everyday.

I have lived a blessed life
But it seems now it's my turn to pay the piper.

Have I grown enough to do it?
Do I have a choice?
No, no choice--
Only to live everyday the best I can.
I don't always make it.
Somedays are harder and I fail.

What will tomorrow bring?
I guess we are not meant to know.
Maybe if we knew, we would not even be able
To get up and face the day.
But
I am better than I was

I've actually learned there is much much more than ... Me.

I will do my best and hope it's enough
And one day
I will pass through that door
And finally ... Know.

Sazzy Oh

~* Aria of Creation *~

I dreamt of singing opera.
The notes flowed out even more beautiful than an angel's voice.
These scattered everywhere making the world more beautiful.
Glimmers and glitters of peace and joy entered the world from ... Me!
The audience kept still so as not to ruin even a single note.
Even I was in awe of the notes as they seemed to come
From some unknown place, from ... could it be ... my soul?
Yes, souls were connecting in a glorious web of spirited unity.
Somewhere from the ethers of space and time,
I was the begining and the ending of everything
And it all flowed through me.
The glories of the score and lyrics created the universe.
From the corner of my eye, as I sung the begining and the end of everything,
I saw the audience fading from view
For all souls become one in a Godhead.
The notes of my song formed a being ... bathed in a rainbow of colors,
And surrounded by a spectrum of sounds.
The audience came back into view
And I knew they were seeing it too as eyes grew wide and moist.
We experienced the ecstacy of an opera turned into a cosmos housing us all.
In a flash of insight,, I knew ... I was creating a world,
A new world
And here in the newness, we grew to be more than before,
Greater souls, seeking the ultimate.
We were as one of my favorite stories of olden time:
Strangers in a Strange Land.

By Sazzy and Dand Rau

~* Memories *~

Yet another year has flown by
Just like the birds soaring in the clear blue sky.
I have soared and I have fallen.
Today I stand at the summit.
Some days I slip down, down, down
To the valley so far below.
Fear and desperation and sorrow
Drag me down
But soon I look up
And I start my long journey again.
As I take each step, as I find each new handhold,
As I find each new path,
I hear that old refrain from the children's book
Repeating over and over in my head:
I think I can,
I think I can,
I think I can.
And then
I near the top and it changes to:
I know I can,
I know I can,
I know I can.
And again
I stand at the top.
Each time the fall is harder
But
Each time the climb to the top
Is a tiny bit easier
Because now
I Know
I ... Can ... Do ... It.
Memories fly away
Over the hills and valleys
But I am still here
And I will make new memories
To share
And life though sometimes hard
Is Good.

~* Whirlwind *~

The early times revolve about me.
Somedays they spin so fast
I can not even see them.
But this day I see the whirl clearly.

Pieces of thoughts fly by
Like torn newspaper clippings,
Headlines rotate through my mind.

I can feel the emotions
As each one twirls past me:
The accidents, the glories,
The politics, the meanings.

As I grow older, sometimes
They overwhelm me
With their myriad memories
From early times:
Joys, sorrows, and moments of deep feeling.

Smells, taste, emotions whirl past me
In a hurricane of memories
To remind me that ... I Am.

DanD Rau & Sazzy Oh

~* Whispers in the wind *~

There are no whispers;
There is no wind;
There is just the vast silence of
Nothingness:

Lost,
Alone,
Tears,
The ache that never quite goes away.

Thoughts hidden,

I tire of digging the huge holes to hide them in.
They push their way to the surface
Faster than I can cover them.

Where are the whispers in the wind,
The ones that used to whisper of hope?
The wind had died;
The whispers are dead,

Just the lonely silence,
Nothing more.

Never give up?
Ha!
Maybe it's time!

How do you get through each day
knowing the next will only be worse?
How do you smile
when your heart is breaking,
broken.

Friends run away.
No one wants to think it could be them.
Lets hide our heads in the sand and pretend.

Is there no one that will hold out a hand,
even one,
To say ... I understand?
I'm here.

Nope,
alone,
Lonely.

The end.

Winter's gift

The winter folds around my shoulders
With its frozen embrace.
Its weight too much for me to bear
And I crumble to the ground,
Motionless ... Void of feeling
Empty.

No sound,
No light,
Only the mind numbing cold
To fill the time

Time seems to have stopped
Until ...

Your hand reaches
Through the emptiness
And pulls me back to hope.

What would I do without you?