~* Bubbles *~

Some nights, all curled up in my warm blankets,
Sensing the cold chill of the wind
Blowing outside my window,
I let thoughts float through my mind
Like that red and white plastic bobber
That bounced up and down
In the ripply waters of the lake
Outside my window when I was young.

The memories float like sparkling bubbles
On the currents of water.
Sometimes they crash against the rocks
On the shore of an angry ocean,
The stormy surf pounding them
Until they pop and float away.

Sometimes they drift peacefully,
Lightly floating,
On the slow gentle currents of a stream,
Bubbles of my life,
The memories kept for me in these beautiful bubbles.
I watch in awe as they float past my consciousness
Shimmering moments of my life.
~*~

~*~ Dark Beauty ~*~

She sits alone in her dark beauty waiting.

She weaves gossamer ribbons
In the shimmering blackness of the night.
The strands so thin and beautiful
Angels might cry seeing them.

Each strand spun with love
She labors into the night.
Tiny drops of dew
Fall from the forest above
Nestling in her ribbons.

Moonbeams shimmer in the air
And seeing the beauty of her work
Entangle with the dew
Becoming sparkling jewels
Nestled among the tiny ribbons.

She sits alone in her dark beauty waiting.

She pauses in her work.
Her gossamer ribbons
Filled with natures tiny jewels
Move in the soft breeze
And beckon ... enter.

She senses ... Him.
She Feels him drawing near.
Her eyes glow in the dark shadow of night.
Her arms reach out.

She can see him now.
All her senses are on him.
If only her beauty, the only gift she can give him
Will be enough.

He pauses in the nighttime shadows.
His eyes meet hers as she sits in regal splendor
In the very center of her gift for him.

He gazes in awe at her beauty,
The intricate beauty of her gifts for him,
All the joy and the wonder that could be his.

He steps forward.
Slowly he makes his way
Past the gossamer ribbons of hope and love/
He can not resist.

She smiles,
Arms extended in a lover's embrace
And once again
Her romantic trap is sprung.

The beautiful dark spider
Or
The beautiful woman?
You choose.
~*~

~* Angst *~

I am so alone.
I can still sense the others,
See the colors, hear the laughter,
But the wires must be down.
I have been disconnected.

I have this ache
In my heart
And I can not make it go away.
Where did it come from?

I am empty inside,
Only this ache.
Will I ever learn?

My beautiful magical forest
Has disappeared.
Now, the dull black and brown of winter
Fits my mood.
Bleak and barren
The icy wind howls ... and it's me.

I feel blown away by this cold cruel wind.
I swirl and swish past hearts turn frigid.
I am all alone.

I am drowning in my own misery,
Reaching out for anyone
To save me from this ocean of despair.

Dante's Inferno was nothing compared
To this woefull angst that I have made
From my thoughts alone.

Worry and anxiety throw me once more
Into the depths of despondency.
The walls are unscalable.
All hope has fled.
I wallow in the melancholy
Of this murky colorless mess.

Can anyone break the ice
That holds my heart imprisoned,
Imprisoned with thoughts
Of what could have been?
Will the Spring thaw this frigid pain?

The warm sunshine of all love
Is hidden in the shadows of loss.
All the beauty of summer gone,
Will it ever return?
Or am I to live forever in this
Cruel gloom?

I ache for the the new birth of Spring,
The sprouting time with its shoots of hope,
The bright colors of new lives born,
My magical forest surrounding me once more
In its tender, hopeful embrace.

I long for hope,
For love,
For sunshine again.
Please, someone
Find the break
And connect me again.

And yet one morning as tired eyes opened,
The golden warmth of the rising sun
Slipped through the pains.
That bright light from without
Lit the small light that had always burned inside
And it grew and grew and grew
Until the amazing wonder of life and love
Opened me up again

No matter how dark the night,
No matter what despair we think we have found,
The light never really goes out.
You only have to open your eyes once more.

The light is stronger than the dark
And hope and love never leave you.
Just open your heart and let your light shine free.
Be the light and laughter and love for all to share.

~*~ Never the end ~*~

~*~ The Door ~*~

Each time, not quite remembering,
I pause at this most amazing door
Made of angel wings and fairy tails.
It shimmers in the mist of time and dreams.

Love is the doorway
Into another universe
And I enter once more.

The pathway glimmers and shimmers
Flowers of I-love-you's
Are planted along the way.
The air is filled with their perfume.

Forests of hope
Gleam in the distance.
Vines of forever
Tangle and slow my step.

Laughter floats in the air
Like notes from the songs of Angels.
I move ever higher into the clouds,
Where happy memories are made,
Wanting so to reach the highest peak.

Finally, I step onto the pinnacle
At the very tippy top
And I pause to look down.
My heart skips a beat.

The path has lost its glow.
The shimmer of excitement
Seems to fade away into the distance,
Now I am pushed down this dark path.

My feet that had been
As light as feathers
Floating in the breeze
Now seem stuck.

The swamp of despair
Made from my tears
Slows my steps.
I am stuck in this muddy mess
That I have made.

I slog through
The downward spiral
Of my tear soaked mire.
The light is almost totally gone.
Darkness surrounds me.

I pause again at a doorway,
No angel wings or fairy tails,
No, they have flown away
On the currents of my making.

I step through this door
And it slams shut behind me.
I hear an echo of my voice
Saying: "I love you."

And then, hurled at me
Like the sharpest of knives
As it cuts into my very soul
I hear only: "I like you too."

Time stops;
Eternity pauses
And my beautiful door
Crumbles into dust.
~*~

~*~ The Rainbow ~*~

Colors sprinkled here and there
Like the fairies spread them all around.
Romantic reds shimmer in a heat of their own
Yellow glows like the fire lit in our hearts
Tears of blue change into sparkles of hope
The green of the earth grounds us.

You are the rainbow in my life
Reminding me of all the colors in it
Bringing me a bit of joy each day
Until we become the gold at the end
Giving more to each other and the world.

Because we are ... Us.

*~*

*~ The Precipice ~*

I live on a precipice
Built of worry,
Teetering on the edge
Of panic.

Disquieted versus serenity,
Is it really possible to choose?
A friend told me
It is my choice to stand on
This razor sharp edge.

I hide from the truth
And live with the worry.

I inherited the gene.
I know I did.
It can not be a choice
To live like this.
It just cannot be.
He must be wrong.

No one would actually choose
To mar this amazing moment in time
With this dreadful worry of what might be,
What could be.

Tomorrow never really comes.
There is only today,
This moment in time,
This time to live and love
And to ... Be.

~*~ A New Year ~*~

A new year is born
As the old one slips away
Into the fog of our past
Tucked into our drawer of memories.

A time for remembering,
Holding cherished memories,
Not willing to let them go,
Not ready to see the future.

A time to reflect,
To make resolutions,
Trying to remember.
To live in the now.

The clock ticks on ... it never stops.
A supercilious clock
Ticking away our time
But we can seize each moment
And conquer that clock.

This moment is all there is -
This magical moment,
No past ... No future.
Just now.

Each moment is a kind of death
And each a rebirth too.
We worry about the tomorrow
That really never comes.

The past shaped us
Never to be forgotten,
An end and a beginning
As we move on
To shape our future.